rancor (n.) – bitter hatred
for
your edification: Have you ever witnessed the cool kids catch
sight of something in particular, assess
that that something in particular is unfortunately not up to the acceptable standard
for cool kids, wrinkle up their cool kid noses, and say something deep and
mysterious like, “Ew. That is so rank”? I have
to imagine that you have, because “rank”
is a popular word of choice that the chosen ones often choose to express their
disgust/anger/boredom/distaste/frustration/confusion/separation/fear/
what-have-you regarding whatever it is they are choosing to assess. It’s like this: “Oh my freaking G, McDonwald (cool kids
always have names that seem like their parents are playing a giant joke on the
rest of mankind). That sweater-thing that
girl over there is trying to wear is so
rank.”
Well,
what’s “ranker than rank”? It’s rancor: something for which you have an extreme,
absolute, bitter hatred. It’s so
rank, it’s not just rank, it’s rancor. Ew. Bitterly
hating it!
Alternatively,
if you are like my cousin Dave and haven’t gotten close enough to a cool person
to hear a cool person use the word “rank”, you might need another way to
remember what rancor means. My cousin Dave and his three skeezy friends
have a really gross ranking system that they use to “rank” girls based on their
appearance. I have a profound, bitter hatred for anyone who ranks
girls (or guys, or cyborgs, whatever), 'cause, lemme tell you, it's not like Cousin Dave is gonna win any prize himself. So, there. Let’s all have rancor for rankers.
examplification - Harrison: I feel nothing but cold and bitter rancor for that rank beast of a calculus teacher after she called my mom because I was texting in
class again. Now I can’t play in the
lacrosse quarterfinals on Thursday. I
hate her.
Marrison: She’s also really nast. As a ranker, I rank her a definitively
not-hot 4. I have rancor for chicks who rank so low in my ranking system. Also for your texting thing, too.
Harrison: Gracias, bronado.
No comments:
Post a Comment