obviate

       obviate (v.) – to eliminate; to get rid of

for your edification:  You know what irritates the mess out of me?  It’s that stupid little word that creepily crept its way into the English language, trying to be all cute and charming; trying to force its way into our everyday talk.  I’m sure you’re thinking of the same word I am:  it’s “obvi.”  Come on:  of course you’ve heard some a-hole try to take the already relatively not-that-huge word “obviously" and attempt to turn that shorter superlame non-word into, like, a thing.  For example, I’m like, “Is that your money sitting on the table?”  And then, you’re being greedy and also kind of a smartass, and you’re all, “Obvi.”  I hate that you just said “obvi.”  I wish we could just eliminate – just completely get rid of – everyone in the whole world shortening the word “obviously” to “obvi.”  Let’s obviate “obvi.”  Also, remember when that dude in your Spanish class said, “obv-balls.”  Let's make sure we're obviating “obv-balls”, too.  Agreed?  Obvi.

examplification -  Patty:   Did you just eat that last doughnut on the table?

Paco:  I obvi ate it.

Patty:  You eliminated it?

Paco:  No.  I obvi ate it. 

Patty:  Yeah, jackass.  Obviate means you got rid of it.

Paco:  I did.  In my stomach.  Obvi.

Patty:  Holy crap.

Paco:  Chaka Khan.