philistine

            philistine (n.) – an uninformed or uncultured individual

for your edification:   Here are three things I know about you if you are a high school Biblical scholar:  1)  your parents are proud of you; 2) Alex Trebek is proud of you; 3) you already know the definition of this word.  If you are among the other 99.423% of your high school peers, then this one is for you.   As a member of that 99.423% that includes you and your peers, well, frankly, you are philistine regarding Biblical academia.  In other words, Alex Trebek would totally call you uninformed and uncultured regarding Biblical knowledge.  He might just call you uninformed and uncultured regarding all kinds of knowledge.  I don’t know the guy, so I can’t really say if he’d be assy enough to do that, but he might.

Anyway, so if you’re not a Biblical scholar, you might need a little help remembering this one.  Okay.  You get to imagine a girl.  Her name is Phyllis.  She’s a teen.  She’s Phyllis Teen (philistine; get it?).  So Phyllis the Teen is pretty much the dumbest adolescent you’ve ever met.  She’s uninformed on everything.  She has no knowledge of the arts; she knows nothing about manners; she’s rude, she’s insolent; she’s pretty much a huge moron.  Phyllis the Teen is a philistine.  She’s a completely uncultured individual.  Simple.

examplification -  Mitzi:  What in God’s name is Phyllis the Teen doing over there under the bleachers?

Muffy:  Awww!  I think she’s eating a turkey leg.  With her feet.

Mitzi:  Oh!  And she’s picking her nose in between bites!

Muffy:  Aaah!  And why is she naked except for those weird knee socks on her feet?

Mitzi:  NO!  That's not a toilet, Phyllis!  NOT A TOILET!

Muffy:  Poor Phyllis the Teen.  She’s a philistine - just a completely uninformed and uncultured girl.

Mitzi:  Her hair looks super-cute today though.

Muffy:  You’re right.  It totally does!