vindicate

       vindicate (v.) – to clear from suspicion or blame

for your edification:  Send the kids to bed, because this is another dirty one.  A great way to remember the meaning of “vindicate” is through a nice little inappropriate bedtime story.  Get your jammies on, pour yourself some warm milk, and then read on.  Ready to continue?  Okay.  Here goes.

Once upon a time there was a very beautiful - but also wildly promiscuous - princess.  Well, wouldn’t you know it, but our fair princess’ slootiness caught up with her, and the young woman began growing a child inside her royal uterus.  It didn’t take long for word of the pregnancy to spread throughout the kingdom, and her father the king was furious.  No one knew who to blame, but the king had his suspicions.  He thought the royal cobbler (that’s a dude who makes shoes), VIN, was responsible.  You see, Vin was always near the princess – he was her number one confidante.  Well, the king told his royal advisors that he wanted to kill the man to blame for babymaking with his little girl.  The king was irate with Vin, so one night, he grabbed his royal scepter and his sharpest sword and ran to the cobbling house.  But when the King threw the door open, he found something unexpected.  It was Vin, on his knees, with Lance, the hottest knight in the kingdom.   The king was confused, then curious, then interested, then relieved (then a little interested again).  For, the king was able to clear Vin from suspicion and blame.  Vin could not have impregnated the princess!  Vin was vindicated!  Vin would not have been interested in the princess!  Why not?  Punchline.  Say it with me: Because Vin dick ate.

examplification  - Mitzi:  My mom’s calling the school board because of that disgusting story our teacher told us to remember the meaning of vindicate.

Sneaky Pete:  Don’t blame her.  She’s gonna be vindicated. It’s a damn good story.