absolution; absolve

        absolution (n.) – forgiveness; freedom from blame

        
       absolve (v.) to forgive; to free from blame

for your edification:  Get ready, homeskeezes; it’s time for some more ab words up in here.  Our abs can help us out in so many ways.  All right.  Let’s first take a look at “absolution.”   It’s made up of ab and solution.  Think of it this way:  If you stuff a lot of junk food and other nutritionally-lacking crap down your gullet, your abs are going to be super pissed, and you’re gonna need to ask for forgiveness from your poor, abused, forgotten abs.  You need to find a solution so your abs don’t hate you forever.  You don’t want your abs to blame you for them being covered by layers upon layers of subcutaneous and visceral fat surrounding your internal organs, do you?  Same with absolve.  You betray those abs, you’ll need to solve the problem by asking the abs to forgive you.  Got it?

examplification -   Rodrigo:  I’m really digging this new pancake-bacon-maple syrup milkshake I invented, but the ever-growing area where my abdominal region should be located is freaking pissed. 

Carl: Dude, ew.   You seriously need an ab solution so your abs will forgive you.  Beg for absolution, man.  You need to “ab solve" this mess by asking your abs to absolve you for your gluttonous sins.  Hopefully your abs will forgive you, fat ass.  Doubtful though.